Scenes from a Wedding
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I had one of those amazing weekends last week. It was my cousin's wedding. Now, this was no ordinary wedding as my cousin is the baby in her family (the youngest of three kids) and the last to get married. It was a splendid affair where we had family from all over world - London, Singapore, Malaysia, Canada, New York, San Francisco and Chicago - fly in to attend. Indian weddings typically last three to four days depending on how many functions are thrown. All of these parties have a meaning and symbolism based on thousands of years of tradition in the Indian culture. One of the nights is called 'Mehndi,' where the women get their hands painted with henna, a temporary tattoo that lasts a few days and then wears off. Usually the designs are elaborate and decorative, for most but it's customary that the bride's hands and feet are covered. The picture that you see is one of my other cousins with a relatively simple mehndi application. Imagine the entire hand covered - that would be the bride.
The next day we were off to the wedding. Dress code for Indian weddings is fairly elaborate. The women wear heavy saris (decorative cloths that wrap their bodies). The men usually wear suits or traditional Indian outfits. For this one, dress code for the men was black tie. The Puri family was in full dress-up mode for this party.
As you can see from this picture of my wife and cousins and other relatives, the colors that are worn are bright and varied. Weddings typically are the events where you go all out, where you wear your best clothes, your favorite jewelry, etc. I mean this is a no-holds-barred event as you can see from the photo of the ladies.
This was a special event in that my 92-year-old grandmother made the trip all the way from India to be here. It was great to see her and she looks great! Our nickname for her is 'Bade Mama,' which literally translates to 'Biggest or Eldest Mom."
Now with Indian weddings, the groom's side, called the barat, will dance their way to the bride's side. This is symbolic of the old days where one village would dance over to another village, have the marriage ceremony and then take the bride home. Obviously times have changed and there are no villages in Southern California so usually the groom's side will dance from one end of the party to the other end where the bride's side will receive and welcome them.
The groom would usually ride in on a horse, or a carriage but every once in a while, the wedding planners go all out and try to do something different. To simulate a royal wedding where the prince would ride in something bigger than a horse, the groom in this case rode in on an elephant. Don't ask me how they arranged to have an elephant in the parking lot of a hotel, but there it was. The procession you see ahead of the elephant is the groom's side wedding party who are all dancing their way to the bride's side.
This elephant was the real deal. Accompanying the groom is always his 'Sirwala' or groomsman. Just in case of trouble, the groomsman can step in and save the day.
Patiently waiting for the 'barat' is the bride's family. The bride is not there. She will come later. But the father, brothers, mom, cousins and close friends wait for the barat to arrive and greet them. The dancing from the barat can last about 10-15 minutes, or in the case of one wedding, the barat took an hour to dance their way to the bride's side, dancing and drinking along the way. Indian weddings are festive occasions so there is usually food and drinks ready for both parties.
The ceremony was a typical Indian ceremony. As you can see from the picture below, this was an outside wedding. Traditional Indian ceremonies are actually done at the very end after the reception when the guests have gone home and the only people left are the close families. Today, however, a bit of blending is done where the ceremony happens first and then the party.
While the groom was seated in the 'Mandip' or the altar where they were to be married, the kids started making a bit of fun of him as he was waiting for the bride. I know in the back of his mind was running the thought, "What if she doesn't show up??"
In the end, of course, she showed up wearing the traditional red that is worn by brides from the region of Punjab (where my family is from). The couple had a great time, the ceremony was beautiful and I want to wish my cousin and her new husband lots of luck in their life together. Congratulations, Sonia and Deepak!
